The Ravenous House

The front door of the hilltop house,

Was warped and faced due south.

When open a glistening tongue rolled out,

The door was a gaping mouth.

The tongue unfurled down the garden path,

It licked the garden gate.

It orally molested anyone,

Who dared to arrive there late.

It lapped at ladies’ perfumed necks,

It nuzzled at their thighs.

It wrapped itself around young men.

It viciously ignored their cries.

All who entered the ravenous house,

Were swallowed raw, and whole.

Picked bones ejected out the back,

In a bin for each spat-out soul.

The door had teeth as sharp as claws,

It was not like most other doors.

It sometimes yawned and often burped,

It masticated and it slurped.

Whenever someone rang the bell,

The door would salivate like hell.

A drooling thing, a Pavlov hound,

Bear this in mind, should you go round.

But should the door take all the blame?

For eating everyone that came?

It was the house, that hungry hut,

Digested people in its gut.

A gut that looked much like a room

All bloody red, a red womb tomb.

In which no visitor stayed placid,

Corroding in digestive acid.

~

The front door of the hilltop house is warped and faces south.

When open a glistening tongue rolls out,

The door is a gaping mouth.

The tongue unfurls down the garden path

To greet you at the gate.

Be ready for a licking, friend,

You’re three minutes, one second late.

It’s lapping at your jugular,

It’s nuzzling at your thighs.

It’s wrapped itself around you.

It will ignore your cries.

And now you enter the famished house,

To be swallowed raw, and whole.

The bones of you tossed out the back.

In a bin for your inedible soul.

The door was not like other doors.

It bit you hard, then burped.

It crunched you to gristly pulp, and as it did it slurped.

Remember when you rang the bell?

The door did drip and drool like hell.

A dribbling thing, a Pavlov beast,

Made greedy for a human feast.

But should the door take all the blame?

For devouring you without asking your name?

Nay, t’was the house, that ravenous hut.

Digested you in its deathly gut.

Yet you must be named culpable too.

Let not our charge be hasty.

The house would not have eaten you.

If you hadn’t been so tasty.

*BURPS*